Friday, January 16, 2009

Managing Expectations

I am one of those people who always has a to-do lists, who struggles to relax lest I miss an opportunity to "do" something, etc. And so for my maternity leave, I made a to-do list. I always have ridiculous expectations of myself and then get sad when I can't meet them.

I was going to:
Do baby and me yoga
Get in shape
Meet new friends (read: great friends) through
Decide our 2009 plan and what we need to do as a family
Do creative and enriching activities with Seren
Decide on a preschool

I have strove to do some of this and I will continue to try to do some of it. But I have put a lot of pressure of myself to be a "perfect" mom while on leave. To focus solely on Seren and Wyeth. To be there for everyone and meet everyone's social, physical and personal needs. Ya know, be the ubermom that I want to be. As if this is the last chance to do it "right".

Ya know what? I can't do it. I can't meet everyone's needs. I can't always do arts and crafts with Seren while breastfeeding Wyeth. The tub needs to be cleaned. The bills are out of order. On some days, I haven't showered until noon.

Wednesday Wyeth turned 6 weeks which means I only have 6 weeks until I return to work. I don't want to waste one more minute worrying about what goal isn't being met or what pile of laundry I should fold. I don't even want to worry about the baby book.

I have a brand new goal for the rest of my maternity leave. Ready? It is complex so pay attention.


That's it. Nothing else. See friends that are around. Enjoy my husband. See my parents. Breathe in my newborn. Play with my toddler. Allow myself to SUCK at being a mom every now and again because you know what? It is HARD WORK , I am up all night and I am TIRED.

That's it. I am all about trying to simplify 2009. Be organized. Be focused. But live with intention! I want to have fun much more often in this new year! And I have the perfect people around to help me do that: my family.


LauraC said...

Having fun on your maternity leave does not mean you are sucking at being a mom. Isn't that what this precious maternity leave is for - to get to know your little baby and transition to a two kid family?

The to-do list will always be there. Unlimited time to be with your children will not. I say enjoy it!

Julie said...

Oh who cares about the tub? Seriously, cleanliness is overrated. Enjoy your baby and big girl--you will be back to work before you know it. You definitely don't suck at being a mom.