I continue to look for small, sacred moments in my life. Having been very involved in church in my life before kids, I really miss the community and the focus the church brings (to me). It has been hard to have been so involved in so many different groups (youth group, women's group, young people group, etc) and then not involved in any groups.
It is a sore spot right now as we continue to search for a church 'home' that shares our liberal values and our social justice politics. We just can't find what we are looking for.
Without that community, I'm left to my own devises in my attempts to remain grounded, passionate and focused on the here and now.
Finding moments to just live in the here and now continues to be a goal of mine. And every day, right around 5 am (or 4 am), I get what I am seeking.
It is around that time that Wyeth wakes up hungry. He still shares our room and I hear him rustling around in his crib. When I go to him, he is laying on his tummy. He flails in protest. And then when he sees that I have come to rescue him, it is pure grace.
His smile lights up the still-not-yet-sunlit-room.
And there, in that moment, that single moment, I feel at peace.
He then joins me in my bed to nurse. I doze. He nurses. And either he is up for the day and begins his action kicking and coo-ing or he goes back to sleep- crooked in my arm.
Every day.
It is the best.
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3 comments:
Hey have you ever looked into Unitiarian Universalists? I recently stumbled upon this myself and can not believe my luck. My friend has been lending me books and I believe we found a church that believes everything we believe. I won't be sure until we visit but from everything I've read, it sounds perfect!
Oh yeah, that is my secret I mentioned on my other blog bc I'm not ready to talk about going to church with my family yet! Big changes!
We got married in a Unitarian church and they were very accepting since Bill and I were raised with different religious backgrounds. It was very warm and welcoming.
Anyway, I am glad you have your moment of peace and that you get it every day. Cheers to that!
No way you guys! I was TOTALLY going to suggest a Unitarian Universalist church! I grew up Unitarian and it is absolutely the church I would join if we're ever looking for a church. I grew up knowing Jesus as a teacher, learning tolerance (REAL tolerance), acceptance, selflessness, and respect for others. In Sunday School, we grew a garden and visited the pond to watch the tadpoles, and my older siblings went to services at other churches and temples to learn about other denominations and religions.
And wow Laura! I totally thought you were going to say you're reading books about how NOT to get pregnant with twins the second time around, and how to raise twins with a singleton! LOL.
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