Wednesday, September 16, 2009

So how is all that change treating you?

Ugh! Change! Cringe!

We are still one stressed out bunch. We are all re-learning the routines, re-defining the roles, re-defining the expectations. On days when we actually sleep, we are all fine. But when does that ever really happen?

A quick recap:
Last Thursday was Sam's last day of work! Yahoo! Que the balloons! Nice job, Sam!
Friday my in-laws arrived: Yahoo! Grandma and Grandad! Que the fun, the silliness, the giggles. Saturday, we had a fun day just hanging out. Sunday, Sam turned 36! Wow! We went to a garden to celebrate. It was beautiful. Sam doesn't look any older. The ice cream cake rocked! And seeing my in-laws was really fun and special. They are so good to us and we all just enjoyed being FAMILY.

And Monday was the first day of preschool! Whew! What a milestone! I couldn't believe how nervous *I* was. As my friend Ruth put it, it is that first glimpse of educators into your life that can be nerve wrecking. And you just hope you did well. That she will enjoy, grow, THRIVE in school.

Seren was SUPER excited the morning of. She squealed in delight as we drove off to the school. Sam, Seren and I were all excited. And then, when we pulled up, the "wrong" teacher greeted her at the car door. Where was Ms. Ann??? She BURST into tears, the snot started to flow, she flung herself at the car as they pried her out. It was miserable! The car ahead of us had a little girl arriving. Her pigtails were bouncing in the wind. A smile on her face. SHE was with Ms. Ann but not Seren. Seren was snot-smeared and stressed out when not 30 seconds before she was giggling with excitement.

She was FINE. Of course she was fine. But I cried seeing her go. (After I was out of sight!) What happens? One second you are trying on maternity clothes, giving birth, the next thing you know, they are going to preschool. And college will not be far behind.

But she had a blast. She called me at work to tell me ALL about it. What she ate for snack. Who she sat next to. What toys she played with. Which swings she sat on. She really had a good time.


But yeah, the other stuff, the changes, that is hard. I find myself awake at night- completely exhausted- just thinking. About work. About the laundry. About verizon wireless customer service. And all the time, the minutes tick by. I continue to be very irritable. Very cranky. Esp with Seren which makes me feel horrible. I had NO IDEA that age three would be THIS challenging. And I can't seem to cope with it well. She just drives me NUTS somedays. The constant needs. The questions. The need to have it done. RIGHT NOW. Not THAT way, THIS way. The not listening to anything we say. How can I encourage more flexibility in her? How can I be more patient myself? The last few days, I have been QUITE ugly to live with.

I'm hoping that some SLEEP plus a night away from childcare duties (thanks to my mom and dad) will recharge my batteries. And Sam's.

So, in answer to my own question about how well we are doing, I'd say that we are "hanging in there and still adjusting."

Cute pictures will be part of the next post.


LauraC said...

I have been thinking about you and all the changes.

N&A drive me completely insane at this age some days. Like the constant "I need milk! I'm thirsty!" as I am in the process of pouring milk into a cup. You can imagine how I feel with two when Jon is gone. And that is why sometimes I use the tv :)

But then the next minute Nate says he loves me and Alex is his best friend and I melt.

Change = so hard!!

Beth said...

LOL at the description of life with a 3 year old. We're all right there with you. Misery loves company! I'm sorry Seren's first "delivery" was a bit traumatic, but what a relief that she had a great day. I'm glad to hear you're hanging in there. But I have to tell you, I think that parenthood is ALWAYS going to be about "hanging in there and still adjusting." Sometimes I think we're just along for the ride!